County government announces a fashion emergency today

The Stylish County Government has announced that there is a 'fashion emergency' today. Three local stylish residents were rushed to the fashion emergency room today for symptoms varying from lightheadedness to vomiting. "All stylish residents are urged to please stay indoors. There is a woman dressed in a 70's style, polyester, red and green, plaid pant suit walking the fashion streets. Long termed exposure to this unfashionable woman could cause temporary blindness, shock, dizziness, fainting, and even vomiting and could lead to a very serious and more permanent condition if left untreated.", announced governer Neil Smithsonian. "I caught a glimpse of her today when I was walking to my car. Just the sight of her bright blue eyeshadow, and bright pink lipstick made me lightheaded, and my vision got blurred. I keep having flashbacks of it. It was so scary!" said anxious, local stylish resident Janice while two fashion emergency room nurses, dressed in stylish attire, fanned her with file folders. Another local named Cathy was admitted to the fashion emergency room, and said she almost went into shock when she turned around to leave the post office after picking up her mail, and almost ran into the badly dressed woman. "I've never been so terrified in my life!" said Cathy, as she burst into tears in her well-ventilated fashion emergency room filled with fans. "The worst case we've seen so far, is Ron, the stylish post office clerk. After being exposed to the woman for 3 straight minutes while she purchased stamps from him, he had to be rushed to the hospital for excessive vomiting. He is still in our care, we've managed to get the vomiting down to every half hour now, so he is almost in stable condition now, physically, but I'm afraid that he might be affected mentally. He keeps repeatedly crying out 'oh my god, it's a beehive haircut!' and stares out into the big nowhere all the time. At the very least, we're afraid he will lose his sense of style.", said Nora, the fashion emergency room head nurse.

Local fashion police have asked residents to please contact their local fashion police department if they see this unstylish woman. "We need to get this situation under control. She is urged to come down to the fashion station immediately and give herself up, we have Cosmopolitan officials standing by waiting to escort her to the nearest mall. Money is not an issue here, we'll pay for everything, we just need our stylish residents to be safe from this type of danger.", urged fashion police officer, Bill Trendyton.